err.. this is not yaoping this is justin.. and i have recieved rather disturbing news that he has passed away in an accident in australia..

at the same cybercafe at the same time as the night before, with only a minute left before my time is up. i'm in melbourne now, arrived here 2 nights ago if you want to know. i'm beginning to have slight regrets about the trip here and there, but sometimes i feel inanely happy too, and i suppose it works out to about a zero sum. had a lot of things to say, but none would come out now (like always) and being on the internet makes me homesick. other than that i think i am taking to this quite well, and it feels as if i have been doing this all my life, even if i am losing weight and sleep.

times up, gotta run!

just spent the afternoon reading l.'s pieces of writing on her website, and was reminded of why i used to be such a groupie. sure she's a mean, cunt assed bitch, but so smart and funny at that!

back when i first met her i was the same 'guileless 16-year-old who'd never heard of riotgrrrl or the Clash' she once was, but listening to her and watching her and furiously mugging up on the tape she made me changed my life. god i'm sure she'd be disgusted to read this.

later i would whitewash my line-toeing chinese school past and act punk as fuck, but deep inside i know i owe all my politics to her and our one-time chance encounter. respect

trivial stuff (isn't that all i ever write about?):

1) today i met an old, old friend and had the happiest time. it felt like we picked up right where we left off years ago, and i am very happy we are seeing each other once again and i sure do hope the feeling's mutual.

2) now that daria and i are through i think i shall spend my time pursuing carrie. i don't think i shall ever be able to bring myself to erase daria though.

3) i still haven't received anything from school, maybe tomorrow

4) the website is in a mess, particularly the 'see more lines' section. i doubt i'd be sorting it out anytime soon, but if i do i'd announce it here ok?

5) this australian rock candy is great!

i'm really tired. it's been 2 weeks and 5 days but i'm not even counting anymore. it's beginning to feel like a game i expect to be able to stop at will but instead takes on a life of its own and drags on like a beckettian nightmare that finally manages to browbeat me into despondency. maybe that explains why i've been feeling so sluggish, so sedate of late. can i wake up now, please?